I have always heard of tips and tricks for busy professionals and/or parents to make time for one another. Recommendations include everything from having a hard bed time for kids to scheduling a weekly date night.
The firm bed time for the kids is important on several fronts as communication is a key for all relationships. Having 30-60 minutes in the evening is important for engaging spousal confidence on mundane as well as strategic matters. Sometimes you do need a few expletives when discussing your day and that is not the language my wife and I choose to use around our children. Currently we are scattered about the house and if we try to talk before going to sleep, I often get spun up and have difficulty sleeping.
I thought date night was a pretty good idea and I set a goal to try to arrange one date night/month. Last year we managed to get out 9 nights as a couple and that was with only one child at home. This year to date we have managed to get out 8 times, but 2 of those were lunch outings. With two kids at home it is certainly more challenging. What I have failed to do is find a reliable baby sitter. The $5-7 per hour premium is a small price to pay for some quiet time.
The lunch time get together sounds good in theory, but only when we can both manage a 90 minute lunch. Driving 15 minutes each way and wolfing down food in 30 minutes is a less than ideal situation.
The easiest plan is just to take a day off on occasion and relax and catch up on each other’s lives on a regular basis. That seems kind of selfish to exclude the girls, but maybe we can find a nice balance.